Thinking of all the television programs I grew up with about the 'nuclear family'. Often they were situational comedies, a humourous, sad but true reflection of the family of that time period. For me there were a few - Married with Children, Full House, Home Improvement, Who's the Boss - they all provided an example of the same kind of dad. Even the sitcoms where the fathers were the only parental figure they were often depicted to be constantly unaware of how to understand their children, often emotionally detached, their relationships with their children hinging on them providing material or financial rewards. I grew up with my male, fatherly role-models being the guys who worked hard and came home exhausted and the ones on television portrayed as bumbling, incompetent and at times a bit idiotic.
Fast forward 20 or so years and there has been significant progress in how dads are received being as involved in the upbringing of their children as much as the mums are. Being a stay at home dad isn't so taboo these days and the representation we have from 'dad type characters' in our television or Youtube screens are now much more aligned with how we view the dad's role in our modern family right? I'm not so sure about that.... I noticed a particular dad gaining in popularity recently through his posts on Facebook. In his video clips he is playing the character of one of those classic dad's from the 80's and 90's. Mumbling, a bit awkward and his most prominent feature is his general approach toward his parenting. Again,. the incompetent dad is hugely popular. Who doesn't love a guy running around after his toddler like it was some kind of Benny Hill episode? Superficially it's pretty funny, clips that are a few minutes long telling the tale of another awkward dad who just apparently fell into fatherhood and is kind of fumbling his way to victory. If I sound kind of annoyed, it's because I am. Where are the dads that actually know what they're doing? When are we going to get representation?! Are informed, reflective, responsive dads just not funny enough?! At least in more ancient times dads seemed to have a function and that was for their families preservation. But through the 20th and 21st centuries we have been portrayed to have regressed to a point where we are just clueless, blindly navigating our way through parenthood. This doesn't just concern me as a dad and the fact that I am extremely under represented, it also concerns me as a teacher who is male and what the perception of me is to society in general. People seem to want more men in early childhood, maybe it's for comedic value so people can watch us 'try' to teach children? Are we looked at unfavourably for infants and toddlers teaching roles because of this idea that we are incompetent therefore we can't be trusted with babies without doing something detrimental to their development?
This lasting stereotype is one that needs to be changed forever. Even though these clips can often tickle our funny bone, we need to consider what perceptions they are creating of the role of men in families - especially as we are continuing to progress in our views of the ever changing family structure. In all seriousness, I would much rather see someone who is strong, sensitive, nurturing, emotionally intelligent, AND funny representing me and who I am in the public sphere than someone who is lacking with all of those except one.
